I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific. – Lily Tomlin

Rocking in my Corner

I am absolutely bored today. School starts in about 9 days. I feel totally unprepared, but it’s coming anyway. If I think I am bored now, just wait until there is only me in the house from 6:30 in the morning until 4:00 in the afternoon. They will find me curled in a little ball rocking in the corner one day, I’m sure of it.

All the joys of my dad moving back in May are quickly leaving. He’s moving back to Florida the end of the month. He’s a grown man and I can’t tell him what to do, but I don’t want him to go so soon. He says that he is bored, not ready for retirement, and wants to go back to work. I can’t blame him. I’m bored too!!! He said he wasn’t going back for good, but when I asked if he could at least come back for Christmas, he said he’d try. Try. That sucks. He hasn’t been here for any of the kids Christmas’. Maybe when my boy was just a baby, but none where they can remember him. I was looking forward to having him here for the holidays this year. But it’s not about me, it’s about him being happy and so I am trying to come to terms with that.

My husband and I have been contemplating a move as of late. More my husband, less of me. Mostly because of the economy. He has a job waiting, according to my brother, so that just makes it more enticing. I’ve done a tiny bit of research of the area and rental prices are through the roof in my opinion. $1,500 a month for a 3 bed, 1 bath home? No thanks. Purchasing a home would be the way to go. A $100,000 home could be purchased for less than $1,000 a month. That seems more logical. Why pay that much rent for something that will never be yours? But with buying comes down payments, closing costs, all that other bullshit they tack on for good measure….sheesh….it will take months for us to save up that. Then, of course, there is the actual cost of moving. We won’t even go there right now.

Money is THE root of all evil. Everything revolves around money, money, money. We work our entire lives for what? Money. Money for this, money for that. And for what? We can’t take it with us when we go, but we’ve got to fuckin’ have it, none the less. I think I maybe in a cynical mood today.

I just realized that, in fact, I’ve blogged about this stuff already. See I do get overly stressed on situations that really are out of my control. I need to just let happen what ever is going to happen. Breathe in, breathe out. Move on.


Comments on: "Rocking in my Corner" (2)

  1. (again) cough cough Blackshear cough coughNo, seriously. I know how you feel. We all need to find an old south Georgia plantation house and move us all in and start a hippie commune. We'll grow hemp and corn. No beans. No cotton. Hemp and corn. And goats. Hemp Corn and Goats.

  2. If ya'll all go, I'm going too.

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